Tips on Managing Summer Stress

Summer is "supposed to be" a laid-back time for outdoor pursuits like barbecues and swimming, time to catch your breath and finally finish all those projects... But the reality is that especially for parents, summer can be hectic and stressful. Here are some of my favorite, most helpful tips for coping with summertime stress and finding a bit more flow and balance.

Somehow, every year I forget how hectic late spring and summer can be…the end-of-school blur, frantic rush to squeeze things in at work and home before summer hits, rushing to and from camps (where are we going this week and what new thing do we need?!), adjusting to a million new routines and places, summer illnesses, the great joys and seemingly endless prep and packing and unpacking of travel…and the list goes on.

Every spring I anticipate summer, dreaming of the looooooong, idle days of sun-kissed activities and doing nothing.

And every June I remember that while there are certainly moments of that…there’s a LOT of other kinds of moments. A different kind of stress. A small pang of letdown about things being different from my expectations.

So in the wake of an absolute WHIRLWIND month, I’ve been doing a lot of work to rebalance lately. And in case it’s useful, here’s what’s been helpful to me:

• Giving myself grace to fall out of routines, self-care and otherwise. This just happens when our schedules are changing, and especially with travel. And beating ourselves up about it doesn’t help.

  
  

• And as soon as I’m able, finding my way back…and noticing how much better I feel! Structure helps our nervous systems settle, and boosts our productivity. And regular self-care generates huge dividends that help everyone in the family. So be gentle with yourself as routines fade, and celebrate the moment you're able to get back in a groove. Remember that even small commitments of time, energy and effort 100% count (e.g. a 10-minute jog or yoga session, starting every day with a smoothie, etc.).
  

• Remembering I can cultivate more of what I want to feel. Vivid visualization utilizes the same neurons and neurotransmitters as if we were experiencing that moment externally. And can help us create new, more desirable mental pathways long-term. So one of my favorite kinds of meditation is calling up what I want to feel more of. Here’s a morning meditation I recorded that uses this technique; and here’s an incredible abundance meditation I’ve been doing near-daily from my teacher davidji. (Both free, just create a login!)
  

• Noticing if I have expectations and trying to release them. E.G.: "But summer should be..." "This was supposed to..." I often get into trouble here and know soooo many other folks who do as well. This is why meditation is so important! (See next bullet. :) )

  If you've studied Buddhism or Buddhist meditation, you may be familiar with a Chinese parable about a farmer who's continually encountering what we'd deem good or bad luck regarding one of his horses. Like life's fortunes changing luck. But he refuses to assign judgment each time. ("Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?") Why? Because he knows that good luck and bad luck are allll mixed together, we're so often NOT actually in control of outcomes, and we never know how things are going to eventually work out. So having expectations and judgment stirs up a ton of pressure and sets up for a cycle of disappointment...and so often they don't reflect reality. Like the farmer, we could stand to let things unfold just a bit more. Let's just see! This is easier said than done, but consider: What if you were just a LITTLE bit softer in your expectations for your family vacation? Or all the projects you're going to tackle before September? With your exercise plan, or your kid's summer schoolwork.
  

• Trying to breathe with what’s here, right now. Instead of clinging to what we WISH would be here, let's investigate: What IS here in this moment? Can I soften to it? Can I find something that feels good in my body right now? What doesn’t feel good physically or mentally, and can I remember that, just like this breath right now, it will pass? An amazing mantra for this situation is: “Just. This. Just. This.” We only have to be right here, right now. Not thinking about Mount Laundry or the work we’re behind on or what we’d rather be doing.
  

• Thinking a LOT about nourishment. Alllll the extra hours of sun, the abundance of nature’s bounty…it’s here reminding us to carve out whatever time and space we’re able for (re)nourishment. To replenish our reserves.Let’s find even small chunks of time to refuel ourselves. And get REALLY CURIOUS about what most nourishes us, body, mind, spirit!
  

All of the above have been profoundly helpful to me, and different ones can feel more impactful at different times.

So if you're suffering from summertime stress, try whichever of the above call to you and see what you think! What’s most helpful? I’d love to hear! Share via the form below, or DM me!